You have to be very sure the copyright police aren't watching you when you use an uber-brand name in any kind of promotional effort that gets distributed over any channel.
The news that luxury goods maker Louis Vuitton has won a lawsuit that alleged a Britney Spears music video violated counterfeiting laws by showcasing a pink Vuitton-upholstered dashboard, is a perfect example. In the opening scenes of the video, A CGI slimmed down Spears appears in the driver's seat of a hot pink Hummer floating on clouds.
One shot shows fingers drumming on a dashboard covered with what looks like Vuitton's "Cherry Blossoms" design: Embossed with the "LV" logo. That's a no-no, and it's going to cost Sony and MTV a $117,000 fine each.
But when you think about Britney's current driving ban when with the kids, and all the other dramas she's putting herself through, If I was Louis Vuitton, or even Hummer, for that matter. I would want to be absolutely sure she was not associated with my products in any way, shape or form!
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I know it's probably old news to you geezers on that side of the pond, but I was intrigued to read today that Emma Clarke, the lady with the sexy voice who has done the pre-recorded messages on the tube for the last few years, with such sexually charged messages as "Stand clear of the closing doors," has apparently just been fired for putting out a series of joke messages on her web site. These included such gems as...
"We would like to remind our American tourist friends that you are almost certainly talking too loudly."
"Would the passenger in the red shirt pretending to read the paper but who is actually staring at that woman's chest please stop. You are not fooling anyone, you filthy pervert."
"Would passengers filling in answers on their Sudokus please accept that they are just crosswords for the unimaginative and are not in any way more impressive just because they contain numbers."
"Here we are crammed again into a sweaty Tube carriage ... If you're female smile at the bloke next to you and make his day. He's probably not had sex for months."
Funny, they all make sense to me! It would seem that people traveling on the "Tube" are required to leave their sense of humour at the turnstile! Which is too bad as the whole bloody thing is becoming a joke!
One of the things I find most disturbing about the recent Facebook announcement of their opt-in advertising scheme is that the personal details of members of Facebook they are now merrily selling to advertisers and marketers, didn't opt-in for that. All they did was fill in a profile.
Zuckerberg has a huge nerve to believe that all that information is his and he can use it in any way he thinks fit to make himself even more obscenely rich. Still, what can you expect from a 24 year old who actually said, "every 100 years media changes." In other words, between the invention of hot metal type and the launch of Facebook, which a fellow student is now taking legal action against Zuckerberg because he claims he stole his idea... radio, film, TV, the Internet and everything else, had no impact on how we communicate and gather information!
Can you imagine what this bozo is going to be like when when he reaches the ripe old age of 30?
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In my last post I talked about the recent death of dick Wilson, the guy who played Mr. Whipple for years. News out today, reminded me that the first thing you learn when living in New York city is that unlike most other cities in the world, there are virtually no public toilets. In an emergency, you have to seek out a coffee shop or department store (where the facilities are on the 12th floor and it takes you 15 minutes to get there!)
So, I was intrigued to read that P&G is promoting Charmin Toilet rolls by opening "comfort stations" in Times Square. Not a bad idea... But as usual they have to announce it with "MarketingMBAGeekSpeak." This is what the P&G brand manager said... "We're seeking to develop an emotional connection with the consumer. It's all about surprising and delighting the consumer with a great bathroom experience when and where they least expect it!" He also said that he "Thought there was a nice appropriateness to the passing of Dick Wilson at the time they were opening the Charmin outhouses!"
Unbelievable! All I can say is this guy speaks a load of shit!
I don't usually do this, but I am posting the piece I did on AdScam yesterday about the death of someone I worked with when I first came to the States back in the sixties...
So, I am saddened by the news today that Dick Wilson, the one and only "Mr. Charmin," has finally kicked the bucket. He was 91, and shilling P&G's bum fodder, as we call it in the UK, made him a millionaire. I worked with him in the early sixties, when I first came to America after talking myself into a job at B&B. Charmin had two campaigns at that time before they finally settled on Mr. Whipple after what seemed like eight trillion focus groups and ad testing. The other campaign was "The Shy Salesman." This prize Dufus sold toilet paper door to door, usually tripping on the door mat, so the bathroom tissue... We were forbidden by P&G ever to call it toilet paper!!!... Floated away, because it was full of "Puffs of air softness." That's right folks, that's what we "Mad Men" did all day, when we weren't smoking, drinking and screwing our brains out! Anyway, I hope Dick will be happy sneaking around the aisles of that great golden supermarket in the clouds, making sure the little old ladies don't squeeze the Charmin. He did, by the way, hold the record by umpteen years, for the longest number of years the same actor played the same role in a campaign."
OK, for the first twenty years of my career, I was too embarrassed to let on that I had been part of this stuff, but having since since done a lot of stuff I'm proud of, I now take a perverse pleasure in it. It's not the ten million pounds Guinness, "Cog" rip off, but it sold a lot of toilet rolls... Ooops, sorry, "Bathroom Tissue!"
When people here in the US wake up to the pathetic state of the US Dollar, they may be slightly disturbed with last weeks news that Brazilian supermodel Gisele Bündchen is now insisting she should be paid in Euros, rather than dollars. But they will probably start freaking out at the increasingly bad news of the last week.
The word from India is that its top tourist sites -- the Taj Mahal, to name one of the most famous -- are now refusing to accept the dollar for admission. Meaning rupees are now superior to dollars, as of course are nearly all foreign currencies at the moment.
But the serious stuff has just happened at the OPEC conference, where discussion regarding the dollar was unintentionally aired to reporters. Members had feared that even letting the word out (about de-pegging oil from the dollar) might cause the dollar to collapse. Along the same lines, the Gulf Cooperation Council is giving serious thought to abandoning the dollar peg. If that happened, collapse might be too mild a word!
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So Jeff "Man of the Year" Bezos is about to come up with the next "Segway!" That's right, in his wisdom, Jeffo has decided to inflict yet another eBook onto the great unwashed reading public. There have been numerous attempts at this in the recent past, all have failed. Not just because of the machines weight, or short battery life, but primarily because they cannot replace the perfect interface. PAPER.
The Kindle, as the Amazon device is known, is light (10.3 ounces) and has a rechargeable battery that lasts for a claimed 30 hours. It also has wireless connectivity, via cell phone protocols, so you don't have to dive into Starbuck's to use the bloody thing. You can download stuff, or pre-load it from discs. All very nice.
There is however, one problem that will ultimately, in my opinion, kill it. The screen is not back lit, in poor lighting conditions it comes with a little attached light that you shine on the screen. And that dear readers, isn't going to cut it. Even at $400 a pop, the Kindle will eventually end up in the back of the broom closet along with the Commodore 64, the wok, Nordic Track... And the Segway.
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Because I fly a lot, I have a ton of frequent flyer miles, and I usually use them to upgrade from economy to business or first class, particularly on long flights. I like the extra room, I like the better service. Hey, you even get free drinks.
That's why I was mystified to read today that here in America, Southwest Airlines is coming out with a deal were if you pay $30 extra - One way - you get to board the plane first... But, Southwest doesn't have business or first class cabins. All the seats are the same. So that $30 means you save about five minutes at the gate... And that's it!
I wonder how many crazy people will actually cough up the extra $30 for basically nothing extra? Although based on the craziness of many people, I wouldn't be surprised if it's a huge success.
With all the recent fuss about product placement, taking it to the extremes is "Cathy's Book"--a young adult novel with specific mentions of Cover Girl makeup products, which is not really a book, as it's been developed, and written by two guys who have never been adolescent girls and do not currently have daughters that fit this description. With the fake authors, illustrators, and the many marketing professionals involved, it's really just a shoddy marketing vehicle.
Loved this quote from one of those involved... "What we are selling here to the customer or the reader is an experience that transcends the book itself," said David Steinberger, president and chief executive of Perseus, the publisher. "The relationships with Beinggirl.com and Cover Girl are enriching that experience." Oh please! Just own up and tell us it's merely part of a rather nasty scheme to influence teenage girls. And is yet another tawdry marketing gimmick!
OK. I know I've posted on this crap before, but someone has to explain the US stock market to me. With news today that Cisco Systems... The guys who make all the routers and other geeky things that keep the Internet humming, and allow you to read these pearls of wisdom... Reported a 37% jump in profit. The networking equipment-maker posted net income of $2.2 billion, or 35 cents a share, on sales of $9.55 billion for the quarter, compared to profit of $1.6 billion, or 26 cents a share, on revenue of $8.18 billion for the same period last year.
On a non-GAAP basis, the company reported earnings per share of 40 cents. Based on a consensus survey, analysts expected the company to report earnings per share of 36 cents on revenue of $9.54 billion.
So, am I going nuts here, but if they exceeded analysts expectations, why did the stock go down. But then again, these are the Wall Street Gurus who are currently writing off billions in bad mortgage ventures. So I guess the answer to my original question is... No one can explain it to me... Particularly the experts. Although, after having fouled up big time, they always walk away with millions. Isn't capitaism great?
For all those "uber-celebrities" who get paid a ton of money for merely showing up, Paris Hilton is without doubt, the leader of the pack. News out today states that she has replaced former pal Lindsay Lohan as Las Vegas nightclub LAX's New Year's Eve good time girl - for a whopping $1m.
You have to feel sorry for the socialite who will end a "tough" year, which saw her spending time behind bars - But not too much time! The 26-year-old heiress is being offered a cool $1m to play hostess for probably no more than a couple of hours. Being paid to show her face is nothing new to Hilton - she reportedly earned more than US$2m, just for sitting in the front row at designer Kira Plastinina's fashion show in Russia on Monday.
As one celebrity authority puts it... "Paris is receiving the biggest payday ever for a one-night appearance in Vegas. Nobody draws a crowd like she does." Lindsay Lohan was initially billed to host the LAX party, but she pulled out earlier this week citing post-rehab sobriety concerns. Mmmm... New Years Eve... Lots of champagne... Peruvian Marching Powder... Smart move!
Hey... By the way... I just realized it's Guy Fawkes day. Go burn an effigy!!!
I was interested to read what went on behind the scenes prior to Apple's British iPhone deal in yesterday's Daily Telegraph. A week before the Nov. 9 release of the iPhone in the U.K., the paper has published a long interview with Matthew Key, the O2 UK chief executive who negotiated the deal with Steve Jobs.
The story offers an interesting perspective on the iPhone, Apple, and its CEO/God/Jobs as seen through the eyes of a English toff. You can read the whole thing by following the link, but what struck me was how O2 disputes as “rubbish” reports that they struck what was called a “madly money-losing deal,” signing over to Cupertino as much as 40% of monthly revenues. Their response was “We don’t sign bad deals.” Yeah... But if I know anything about Steve jobs... It won't be a great deal either, and it'll be quite a while before they start making money any on it!
Word here in the US is that Google is in late stages of talks with various wireless carriers, including Sprint Nextel and T-Mobile, about equipping cellphones with new software designed by the 800 pound Internet gorilla, according to insiders. This is just one of several ventures Google is making into the wireless market as it tries to expand its advertising empire to cellphones.
In addition to partnerships with wireless carriers, Google is also talking to software developers and handset makers. The word is that agreements could be reached during the next two weeks. Customizing handsets with a Google operating system would rewrite the traditional wireless business model. Today's wireless carriers and handset makers determine which applications consumers can access with their cellphones.
Google aims to break open these restraints by introducing a system that would be compatible with third-party features and services. In other words, software companies could design new features to work with Google's software. No doubt adding even more billions to the valuation of the company that will eventually control the universe!
George Parker
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