November 2008 - Posts - Devil's Advocate - Blogs

Pret BOGOF hoax

While I have to sympathise with Pret a Manger having become victims to the latest internet coupon hoax, I also had to smile that the media were ascribing the dirty work to an industry outsider on the grounds that the fake voucher contained a typo. Come off it - what planet are they on? I run whole training sessions lasting for hours with endless examples of typos, mis-speelings and grammatical errors as the subject matter. Our industry is jumping with them (for reasons that we all know). Far from proving this was the work of some mischievous schoolboy, if you ask me the presence of the typo is concrete evidence that a marketer had a hand in it.

Posted Nov 27 2008, 01:28 PM by Ian Moore with 2 comment(s)

New from Tesco - 'BOGOD'

I note (via the ISP website) that Which? researchers claim to have discovered offers in M&S, Waitrose, Sainsbury and Tesco that allegedly broke the new government regulations on unfair commercial practices - these concern, for instance, the requirement for goods to have been on sale at advertised higher prices for at least 28 days in that store, in order for claimed discounts to be considered valid, that kind of thing. I imagine these are mostly mistakes - otherwise that wouldn't be very good PR, would it? - just like the one the eagle-eyed Telegraph reader photographed last week in Tesco: a "2 for £3" shelf-talker, also advertising single purchases at £1.47.... isn't that 'Buy One, Get One Dearer'?

Posted Nov 25 2008, 03:53 PM by Ian Moore with no comments

Strictly free advertising

Auntie must be rejoicing at the latest national furore stirred up by one of its erstwhile employees - just when presenters across the network were gritting their teeth and grudgingly reporting on the start up of ITV's ever popular 'I'm a Nonentity', over the brow of the hill comes the cavalry in the lumbering form of - dare I say it - The Dashing White Sergeant! What a relief - now they can report ad infinitum (or should that be ad nauseum?) on their own 'troubles', and take the limelight away from those undeserving low-brow oiks across at Commercial HQ. Wow - and what limelight! There's no brand in the country that could have afforded the airtime budget that the Beeb have splashed on Strictly in the past couple of days - who'd guess we're in the middle of the steepest recession since... the last recession? Neat footwork, Auntie.

Posted Nov 20 2008, 01:14 PM by Ian Moore with no comments

NEVER MIND THE B***H

Yes - this particular censored expletive confounded us over the weekend, too. An "investigation" by The Sunday Telegraph into the level of swearing in 12A films naturally caught my attention (after all, my favourite joke has to be the primary school alphabet class and the foul-mouthed boy, you know the one: "Dwarf - Miss - dwarf!"). Evidently too many naughty words are sneaking under the radar of the British Board of Film Classification. Given we'd just taken the kids to see Ghost Town, and it appeared in the ST's rogues' gallery, I was intrigued to see which particular cusses had fallen upon their angel ears without me noticing. The answer, apparently, was 2 f***s, 4 s***s, 5 asses (seemingly an 'American-style' swear-word, but not bad enough for the ST to disguise it), plus the one mysterious b***h. Just imagine - some trainspotter sat through 24 hours of films, ticking a checklist for this article! Now, I've always thought I've had quite a talent for swearing (in appropriate company, of course) (second thoughts, delete that space after the word 'in'), but b***h left me scratching my head. B****r, b*****d, b****y, b******g and B******s - yes, I'm fully familiar with all of them and can usually fit them comfortably into a single sentence (especially when doing DIY, or - like this weekend - seeing that Leicester were 2-0 up with 4 minutes to go and assuming the points were safely in the bag). But b***h... hmm? I wondered, should I ask the kids? - no, it would be too embarrassing to admit they might know an expletive that I didn't. This forced me to do the one thing I didn't fancy, which was to read the article itself - I mean, half a page of broadsheet eked out from a tenuous proposition. Eventually, after a couple of attempts, I found the mystery word presented in its 'swearing context', and realised you'd need to be something of a lateral thinker to work this one out at first sight. Is it a swear-word, even? Well, in case it is, I'd better not type it out in full - but all suggestions welcome on a postcard. In the meantime, what's this got to do with my marketing blog? Well, I'm frantically trying to work that out as I'm going along, but I think the moral of the story is that you can't be too careful with the language you use - never assume your reader will understand what you're talking about when you present them with anything resembling a riddle.

Posted Nov 17 2008, 09:35 AM by Ian Moore with 1 comment(s)

Putting the SP into sperm

I heard on the radio this morning that as a nation we're facing not only a shortage of nuclear power stations, but also sperm donors. Apparently there's only 300 or so brave souls going about this particular branch of the fission and fusion business. (Cripes, what will the population all look like in a couple of generations? The same, is the answer I'm thinking of.) But it did strike me there's probably a better way of stimulating traffic to the sperm banks than simply by trying to appeal to the Genghis Khan in us (and I understand there IS a bit in just about every one of us!). It used to be that there were only 3 SP mechanics: Free, Win and Save. Not only could we develop a campaign for sperm donation that incorporates all of these (and I'm leaving the creative development to your imagination here), but also we could clearly include the 'new' fourth mechanic, 'Give'. The act of giving is now recognised by the ISP as a valid reward for a consumer, as a result of taking a particular action. So, not only is the mechanic ripe for an outstanding campaign, with a theme like this it really ought to be like falling off a log to recruit 3rd-party co-promoters. Ann Summers springs to mind (and if only we had Holland's liberal retail regime...). Indeed, once you sail down this particular canal, it doesn't take a Biological Scientist to reach the conclusion that there really is an easy way to have would-be donors queueing around the block, around the clock, and that's simply down to a bit of good old (or is it new?) experiential marketing. Again, I leave the executional aspects to your imagination, but it would be based on the sound principles that underpin any good experiential campaign: a bit of theatre, staff that look the part for the task in hand (ahem), appropriate costumes, the correct attitude, wow the customer... come on! ... we can save the human race!

Posted Nov 12 2008, 12:02 PM by Ian Moore with no comments

Murray Mint

I'm sure you noticed the logo on Scotland jerseys and prominently displayed around Murrayfield's stands this weekend (well, you probably didn't... fair enough)... it was just one word, Murray. Now, the last few weeks I've been banging on about free advertising (and suggesting that, in order to take advantage, firms launch brands called Satnaq, Solace, and Quantum. Somewhat tongue-in-cheek, I admit, but some of these names are already trading). Here was another example, indeed a not insubstantial chunk of marketing expenditure doing the job for, well.... for whom? Having lived in Edinburgh for many years, when I see an ad for 'Murray' I automatically assume it's for the long-established and successful multi-outlet car dealership group, the Murray Motor Co. Well done to them, I thought, for getting behind Scotland. Excellent targeting too, given the rugby audience and the fact that they hold franchises for a number of the more prestigious marques. It was only when browsing the net after the game that I realised it wasn't them. Nope. Instead it was David Murray's (of Rangers renown) Murray International Metals. Except the logos all just said Murray. It does amaze me that things like this slip under the radar. It shouldn't, because I see it time and again. Ah well, any CTN owners reading this - get ready for a run on Murray Mints first thing Sunday morning.

Posted Nov 08 2008, 08:32 PM by Ian Moore with no comments

Faceful of Maltesers

If you collapsed with mirth when the laugh-a-minute Daniel Craig was invited by the laugh-a-minute Jonathan Ross to come up with titles for the next Bond movie, it may have struck you that here was a missed product placement opportunity. I mean, right now two of the most heavily promoted brands in the world must be that mysterious couple, Solace and Quantum. Paid-for and free, they're getting wall-to-wall, floor-to-ceiling 24/7 coverage. And who benefits? Well, I imagine, firms like Quantum Sports Cars of Devon, or maybe the eponymous recruitment consultancy based up in sunny Edinburgh. Then there's the oxymoronic 'Pub Church' named Solace (yes, Pub Church... it could only be in Cardiff)... or perhaps Solace Podiatry over in Belfast. They must be coining it in. Unimagined levels of publicity and no danger of being confused with Mr Fleming's intended Quantum and Solace - not likely... not when the average shopper's reading age is 11. I'm sure mine's a year or two above that, but I confess I'm challenged to come up with a snappy explanation for either word. Stick them together and you've got a phrase to confound all but the Mensa members in our midst. I'm only surprised more enterprising firms aren't jumping on the bondwagon (sic) and launching a welter of Solace SKUs and quirky Quantum soundalikes. Which brings me back to the title of the next movie. They've no doubt already sold off all the best spots in the screenplay to the big bidders, but surely the most prized position in the 'Bond Street' shop window is name of the movie... hence my initial idea - a poor effort, I agree, inspired entirely by it being a description of what I was doing at the time I started writing this post. But all suggestions welcome, and maybe we can forward the good ones to United Artists and ask for a cut, should the winning deal be struck.

Posted Nov 02 2008, 09:52 PM by Ian Moore with no comments

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