Darby on TV

BBC wins unlikely backing for Nick Griffin Question Time

Ian Darby — Mon, 26 Oct 2009 11:23:00 GMT

I enjoyed reading Saturday's edition of The Sun. While its editors were placed in the baffling position of having to endorse the BBC (which it has been making vitriolic attacks on almost daily for months now) it deserves praise for its strong condemnation of the BNP and Nick Griffin.

But the paper's coverage of Griffin's appearance seemed to lack some of the relish and sharpness that usually characterises its coverage of major events. Maybe this was because it's such a serious subject or maybe because The Sun's staff were confused at having to support the BBC.

For once, it was Saturday's edition of the Daily Star that eclipsed The Sun on a major story. The paper opted for a p2/p3 DPS on Griffin's appearance and ran a side bar story comparing him to an evil Captain Pugwash. This together with the best sports quiz/crossword page in UK newspapers (a must for all travelling football fans on a Saturday)made the Star's package a winning one.

That said, it was good to see The Sun doing the right thing within such a volatile debate, especially as, judging from the texts it ran from readers, many of its audience don't agree with its stance.

Booze Britain isn't all bad according to C4

Ian Darby — Tue, 20 Oct 2009 10:30:00 GMT

The establishment assault, from both left and right, on "Booze Britain" culture is pissing me off. Labour hiking taxes on alcohol while the Tories are threatening to double duty on drinks such as super strength lager and cider while leaving their favourite tipples like malt whisky and fine wines untouched.

Sometimes more balance is needed in the argument. It's not all about pissed up idiots knocking seven shades of *** out of each other after downing 20 shots on a Saturday night. And Channel 4's documentary The Red Lion, which aired last Thursday, captured this beautifully.

Part of the Cutting Edge series, The Red Lion film, directed by award-winning documentary maker Sue Bourne, was an entertaining and, at times, moving snapshot of some of the characters that populate the thousands of Red Lion pubs around the UK.

We saw old ladies who needed their pub as a refuge against loneliness, a tee-total women's darts team in Scotland, a rugby team and a ladies hockey team who used their Red Lion pubs as places to drink heavily and a character called "Reg the Hedge" so called because "There's a very large hedge down my way and a couple of times, I actually fell in it. I fell in one time and couldn't find my way out."

A real mix of people who showed that the life of the British pub is vibrant and (Reg and the rugby boys aside) not all about getting as smashed as possible. And the close of the film, which showed the impact on people when their pub has shut down, illustrated that everything should be done to save the local. So check out The Red Lion on 4oD if you get chance.

Is it good to see Moore of Sir Roger?

Ian Darby — Wed, 07 Oct 2009 09:46:00 GMT

I’ve long been a fan of Sir Roger Moore, so was amused by his appearance in the latest Post Office ad.

Once I’d got over the shock of seeing Sir Roger in this context - after all he’s more associated with boring, worthy charity work for the likes of UNICEF these days - I couldn’t help feeling a bit depressed.

Has it really come to this? A man of Sir Roger’s stature, he was once James Bond for God’s sake, is reduced to flogging financial products for the Government.

The ad itself is predictable but no great embarrassment (Sir Roger does a knowing raised eyebrow to camera and is involved in a cheesy “smoothie” gag but by no means disgraces himself).

But then it seemed sad to see him spending time doing this stuff rather than enjoying himself in the South of France or on the ski slopes somewhere.

He can’t need the money but that’s never really mattered to Sir Roger who just seems to like earning the stuff. And why not? Sir Roger has always been the type to turn a turkey into a golden egg, seeing film as a highly commercial enterprise rather than an artistic endeavour. Any man who has starred in movies such as The Cannonball Run, Bullseye! and Spice World can’t afford to take himself too seriously.

And hopefully the ads will prompt UK TV producers to consider Sir Roger for parts again as he’s never actually retired from acting. The Midsomer Murders creators could do worse than revisit their idea of approaching Sir Roger and his friend Sir Michael Caine to feature in an episode.

Disrespect to Simon Cowell, Strictly and X-Factor

Ian Darby — Mon, 05 Oct 2009 13:53:00 GMT

I've got no real problem with the nation's obsession with Strictly Come Dancing and The X-Factor. An obsession fed each and every day by the national press - so there's instantly several pages of every paper I have little interest in as I watch neither show.

But it's the tone of reverence some journalists use when discussing these shows that grates. It's as if Simon Cowell, Bruce Forsyth and Cheryl Cole were Gods on a higher plane, the way some commentators bang on. No wonder the stars of these shows behave in such an out-of-touch manner.

I really must stop listening to Radio Five Live but its morning news programme today carried a lengthy and earnest review of both shows as though they represent the greatest artistic achievements of mankind rather than the cheap and easy entertainment they really are.

So more disrespect and general piss taking towards these shows should be obligatory. This should keep Cowell's ego in check and make Strictly participants think twice before abusing their new found fame.

Gregg Wallace : Wet Lettuce

Ian Darby — Wed, 23 Sep 2009 13:58:00 GMT

I'm a big fan of MasterChef and wish it were on commercial TV. And the current MasterChef: The Professionals series is moving along well.

The role of big gurning Gregg Wallace, usually so central to the MasterChef experience, is hard to fathom though. While he's usually a crackerjack of enthusiasm, opinions and expressions he's not himself on this version of the show.

Probably because he has to blindly follow the opinions of top chef Michel Roux Jnr. who, as a god of the commercial kitchen (he has two Michelin stars don't you know) is held in awe by each contestant. He might look and act like a simian automaton but his pronouncements carry the weight of Zeus.

That's a shame for Gregg because he's essentially become Roux's nodding dog. Albeit one who scoffs a lot of creme brulee, but a nodding dog all the same.

And though all young chefs seem to want to be Roux (a bit like all nine-year-olds on the play ground want to be Wayne Rooney) professional cooking doesn't look as much fun as professional football. Why would anyone, anywhere, want to be a chef? It's hot, repetitive work with long hours and low pay so what's the point?

The death of the football pundit

Ian Darby — Mon, 21 Sep 2009 09:10:00 GMT

I'm really enjoying ESPN's coverage of Italian "Serie A" football. Primarily because it's totally stripped down. Seemingly opting for the budget option, ESPN has no studio filled with pundits but goes straight into the action and then runs a bunch of ads for Bet 365 and trails at half-time to fill the space. Just one commentator to describe the action.

Saving cash on hiring James Richardson to sit in a studio with a bunch of ex footballers might seem a bit tight but it adds up to a refreshingly simple approach in these days of overblown football coverage. I rarely watch the pre match hype or the so-called half-time "analysis" from the so-called experts, opting instead for a half-time raid on the fridge or biscuit jar. I've watched the action and can tell what happened, I don't need some muppet encased in tight silver trousers reitering what the commentator has already said.

So maybe it's time for Sky and ITV to kill off all those inane pundits and half-time filler. Especially when, as with Kenny Dalglish on ITV, you can't understand a word they're saying.

Peter Fincham clear favourite to replace Andy Duncan

Ian Darby — Wed, 16 Sep 2009 14:21:00 GMT

So Channel 4 finally confirmed that its chief executive Andy Duncan is to step down at the end of the year. After grappling for months with C4's funding hole, Duncan looks set to leave along with chairman, Luke Johnson, at Christmas.

The search is on for a replacement. But many in television reckon that all bets should be off as Peter Fincham, ITV's director of television, is such a red hot favourite. The sort of respected programmer C4, whatever it looks like in the future, should have at its helm.

Fincham's supporters suggest that this becomes even more likely should Tony Ball arrive at ITV as chief executive. The former Sky man's no-nonsense approach may be what ITV needs but might not sit well with Fincham's creative ethos.

So Fincham for C4 by the end of the year then. But whatever happens it is time for change at two of Britain's top TV companies. Duncan's resignation to the C4 board coincided with an inauspicious week for ITV which has lost both the real and the PR battle over CRR. Michael Grade staked a great deal on its removal and must be disappointed at the Competition Commission's decision to keep it in place. You have to sympathise with Grade at having to manage ITV through such as vicious downturn and, to a degree, he has made strides in restoring its reputation for strong content but he knew it was time to move on.

Meanwhile Duncan and his C4 team have seemed lost in a maze, running first this way and that in a bid to find a way out but becoming increasingly lost.

Both ITV and C4 sorely need new leadership and soon.

The BBC could learn something from Silvio Berlusconi

Ian Darby — Mon, 14 Sep 2009 10:06:00 GMT

One thing you have to admire about the Prime Minister of Italy are his balls. Metaphorically speaking of course.

Last week, trapped in yet more scandal over "beautiful women" attending his parties, he continued to insist that he has never paid for sex: "For those who love to conquer," he said, "the joy and the most beatiful satisfaction is in the conquest. If you have to pay, I ask you, what joy is there?"

A question every TV viewer in the UK should be asking as they are told to fork out £139.50 a year to access the BBC's services. And also a question BBC director-general Mark Thompson should be considering as he heads a review of the BBC's operations after being told to do so by the BBC Trust.

Yet with the BBC in charge of a review of its own future, you could say it's unlikely that any significant or welcome change will result. And commercial media owners can hardly be encouraged by the BBC's attitude at the recent Edinburgh TV Festival when the response from BBC executives to criticism from the likes of Sky's James Murdoch seemed to smack of arrogance and being out of touch with audiences.

While I'm not convinced that the BBC's investment in online services is wholly a bad thing for the public or even the commercial sector - everybody seems set to benefit from the leadership role the BBC played in developing the iPlayer - at least four measures should emerge from the review.

These are: the closure of digital TV service BBC3, which wastes tax payers money while offering nothing that commercial rivals cannot; a ban on cross-promotion of BBC TV and radio on other platforms; stricter controls on services such as Radio 1 which seem intent on aggressively copying commercial services rather than offering anything challenging or groundbreaking; and, finally, top-slicing of the hideously expensive licence fee to help the local news providers that have been damaged by the BBC's online investment. Even the money saved from closing BBC3 would be of some use to these regional news organisations.

Not that much of this seems likely with BBC executives responsible for the decisions. While Thompson's comments today on part-privatisation of commercial arm BBC Worldwide hint at a willingness to concede an inch, they may be designed to mask the BBC's intention not to do very much at all about playing a constructive part in a diverse media landscape.

Where the hell was Danny Dyer?

Ian Darby — Thu, 27 Aug 2009 15:17:00 GMT

Watching Sky Sports' "coverage" of events inside and outside West Ham's ground the other night I was suddenly struck with the thought "Where the hell is Danny Dyer when you need him?"

For those of you who missed it, Tuesday night's football commentaries were dominated by events off the field in London's East End as Millwall's fans played out a game of "who is the fattest football hooligan" with their West Ham rivals. One professional Londoner was missing from proceedings though and that was Dyer.

Dyer is perpetually on Bravo talking to blokes who are "proper hard" (they are invariably former gangster or football hooligans or both). But when there was real action right on his own doorstep, where the hell was Dyer?

I would have loved Sky to switch right over to "Dyer-Cam" as the little fella attempted to interview burly nutters on Green Street while they threw fists and bricks at each other. Instead we were stuck with naive Scouser Phil Thompson telling us how horrified he was with events. What did he expect - it was West Ham v. Millwall after all?

Now my illusion that Dyer was a "proper geezer" who could stand shoulder to shoulder with the "faces" out East has been shattered. Maybe he is an actor after all.

ESPN coverage lacks heart

Ian Darby — Mon, 17 Aug 2009 08:39:00 GMT

Nobody seems to be mourning the demise of Setanta. Not with ESPN coming in and picking up right where it left off in coverage of the 46 Premier League football matches that Sky doesn't have.

And ESPN got lucky on its first weekend by picking a game (Everton v Arsenal) that, unless you're a sorry Everton fan, you couldn't help but enjoy. Seven goals in total and some beautiful football from the North London team.

ESPN's coverage was solid enough. Ray Stubbs, fresh from the BBC, anchored events in typically stoic fashion. While other football presenters, Lineker, Jeff Stelling et al, might be show ponies, Stubbs is more of a pit pony. Grimly and gamely perservering with his one or two chosen themes throughout.

The broadcast began in ridiculously over the top fashion with actor Steven Berkoff delivering a soliloquy from a theatre stage. But then ESPN isn't the only broadcaster to be guilty of overhyping its product.

After that it was all pretty much as expected, with no real gaffes. Studio pundits Ian Wright and Peter Reid (whose long side burns make his head appear even more simian than previously) were unspectacular and commentary from Jon Champion pretty much picked up where he left off at Setanta.

ESPN has introduced the obligatory bit of trademarked slow-mo technology (dubbed the "Axis") and its studio looked hi-tech to the point of blandness. All of which risks reducing the excitement on the pitch to the equivalent of the Tin Man in the Wizard of Oz: lacking heart and soul. But for a first outing, it was reassuring to have ESPN (helped by Sky's production team) behind the cameras.

"Nick f***in Knowles"

Ian Darby — Wed, 12 Aug 2009 13:14:00 GMT

Weekend TV is bad during the summer. Especially on Saturday nights. When the best you can hope for is an episode of A Touch of Frost repeated for the eighth time then you know that everybody really has given up and gone to Spain or Provence.

Still, even then I haven't been desperate enough to watch the new BBC Saturday night lottery game show, Guesstimation, hosted by Nick Knowles ( or Nick "f***in" Knowles as the band Half Man Half Biscuit call him in their song Upon Westminster Bridge).

How Knowles, who once hosted DIY SOS, even made the progession to BBC1 Saturday prime time is beyond me but I'm just glad that ITV or any other commercial broadcaster isn't paying for his "talents". The only reason I know he's hosting this show is because the BBC is endlessly puffing it with promotions on its radio stations. A practice that should be outlawed. For my sanity as much as for the fortunes of commercial broadcasters.

Peter Andre's off to Edinburgh

Ian Darby — Mon, 03 Aug 2009 15:10:00 GMT

As a fan of Peter Andre's early work (his dancing under a waterfall in the Mysterious Girl video for instance) I was amused to see that the singer is off to the Edinburgh TV Festival later this month to give a masterclass on reality TV. A more dignified comeback after tales of marital strife than his estranged wife has managed, I thought.

But then Andre's essentially just joining a long list of "talent" washing up at Edinburgh this year as work becomes hard to come by and less lucrative. Who knows if ITV2 will continue to pay Andre for allowing them to film him now Jordan has gone? (though a one-off 90-minute special "Going It Alone" will air later this month).

Anyway, Andre has to join a queue of celebrities appearing at the Festival including Top Gear's Jeremy Clarkson, Ross Kemp and Ant and Dec. A sure sign that the need to impress TV executives has never been greater for those front of camera, especially as broadcasters threaten to cut their salaries.

Midsomer - the best police show on TV

Ian Darby — Wed, 22 Jul 2009 10:37:00 GMT

Midsomer Murders makes a welcome return to ITV1 tonight. John Nettles, who is set to retire from his role as DI Barnaby in a couple of years, and the rest of the cast have filmed two new episodes.

So my Sky+ is already set. Because I can't watch Midsomer on a Wednesday evening. The only right time is a Sunday afternoon, slipping into evening, with a receding hangover and a cup of tea and a packet of biscuits handy.

This week's episode is, says my copy of What's On TV, set in a golf club "rocked when a player is bludgeoned to death on the 13th hole". How much more English can you get? Midsomer offers pure escapism and as such is a perfect antidote to the likes of The Wire with its drug dealers ladelling out the foo-foo dust before being trapped by the "polis".

Now I like them both but give me camp old Midsomer over The Wire every time. Especially as it attracts millions of viewers to ITV1 and advertisers can have a bit of the (admittedly zimmer-paced) action.

Channel Five: "farming, fishing and fighting"

Ian Darby — Tue, 21 Jul 2009 10:53:00 GMT

Dawn Airey once famously described Five's output as "football, films and f**king". Now she's back at the broadcaster she seems more intent on reinventing it along the lines of "farming, fishing and fighting". Highlights in its schedule include Farmer Wants a Wife, Robson Green's Extreme Fishing and a season of fight movies featuring Steven Seagal and Jean-Claude Van Damme.

All very enjoyable. But I have to say I'm most taken by Five's solid Ashes coverage. Coming home last night awash with good feeling after England thumped the Aussies at Lord's I couldn't wait to watch the highlights. And Five's perfectly scheduled, 45-minute package fitted the bill perfectly. For once, even Mark Nicholas (a kind of wannabe David Gower) didn't irritate too much as he conducted a celebratory interview with England hero Andrew Flintoff.

Geoff Boycott and Simon Hughes provided insightful commentary and Five deserves praise for putting together an entertaining short-form version of the day's events. If you can't watch the action all day on Sky then Five is providing an excellent alternative that advertisers appear to be supporting in their droves. I can't wait for next week at Edgbaston.

Shortage of quality drama a big worry for advertisers

Ian Darby — Tue, 14 Jul 2009 12:56:00 GMT

Today the BBC Trust, in its annual report review, has called on the BBC to produce better drama. Harsh you might say given the screening of Jimmy McGovern's excellent The Street on BBC1 last night.

Until you realise, that is, that The Street is produced by ITV Studios. And that this will be the last series because ITV Studios has wound down its Manchester base and McGovern is unwilling to move production to another studio.

Depriving the Beeb of a quality drama but also highlighting that ITV too will be stripped of some of the quality and diversity of programming it has been attempting to build in recent years. Speaking on the BBC Radio 4 radio show Front Row, McGovern said that ITV has "closed down the producers of the best content".

Advertisers should worry about the impact of this as quality on ITV could suffer as a result. Let's hope not but this seems an inevitable result of cost cutting.