Dan Douglass on direct

Dan Douglass

I've been wondering why I've had not one comment on my recent blog-post about direct marketing surviving the recession. And then the penny dropped. Yesterday, I heard about how scientists have revealed that fear is quite literally physically contagious (presumably, these scientists are the ones who haven't been busy discovering the human genome, genetically re-mastering crops, refining the blueprint for coal-fired nuclear power, cloning human tissue or patenting anti-cancer drugs - and therefore have time to do this sort of inconsequential study). Apparently, we don't just smell fear in others. It's passed on through pheromones secreted by the human sweat glands (which is why panic and terror spread so quickly). Indeed, the armed services are now looking at human sweat as a counter-insurgency weapon. Hard on the heels of this comes the blinding revelation that happiness is entirely a social phenomenon. Another set of researchers from The University of the Common Cold, or some such American- mid-west -quasi-scientific-para-academic -institution- foundation, have deduced the following from a study of 5,000 people over a number of years. That if you surround yourself with happy people, you too will be happy. And if those people know other happy people, you will be ecstatic. And if those people know other happy people who know other happy people, then you'll be like a pig in do-do. It goes to about four degrees of separation before the effect starts to wear out. Which is interesting, if unsurprising. Because, with the digital age, seven degrees of human separation have now been reduced to just 4.5. So you could say viral marketing is one of the most powerful tools human civilization has at its disposal in spreading global happiness. And why all of us involved in viral marketing should take that responsibility very seriously indeed. I won't even go into the debate about what defines happiness (it was a bacon roll for me this morning), but suffice to say it's now scientifically proven - laughter and joy are infectious. And, unlike fear, you don't physically have to be in the company of happy people to be infected. Just surround yourself with them, virtually or otherwise and it will happen osmotically. Which accounts for the reason why, with viral, funny is more powerful than shocking. And may account for the lack of interest in my blog-post raising the spectre of recession. After all, despite the term 'viral', digital experts have as yet failed to find a way to transmit fear pheromones and sweat droplets down our broadband wires. And virtual fear and shock are poor substitutes for that.