Campaign

Mumsnet, Britainthinks and the OAA -- an update

Hi. As requested on this blog and on mumsnet, an update.

We believe the OAA are working as hard as they can with the individual poster companies they represent to get the offending poster down.

Meanwhile we are working with the OAA to get another poster up. Although, to be clear, this poster will not be endorsed by mumsnet, it does reflect the sentiment of the mumsnet site regarding the original poster. It also reflects many of the suggestions from mumsnet for a new poster.

We like the poster. We think it helps set the record straight. We hope it will make people think.

If the OAA and the individual outdoor companies that the OAA represent agree to run the poster we believe it will run on a significant number of digital sites above ground and underground.

If you support the idea of this poster running, no harm in speaking up.

In line with suggestions on mumsnet we have decided to give the £1000 to Refuge.

WE'RE SORRY.

Robert and I would like to apologise to anyone we've offended with one of the posters we created for the OAA.

The reason we've waited until now to apologise is that the strength and nature of the reaction to the poster, specifically on mumsnet, shocked us. At first we were not sure what to do.

It had not been our intention to cause such offence, nor to attract such abuse.

Our intention was to provoke discussion. We believed that both the poster and the content of the Britainthinks website reflected this. We accept we got this wrong. 

It has been suggested that we are about to commence legal proceedings against mumsnet. This is categorically not the case. 

We have asked that they operate within their own editorial guidelines which they now are doing. 

We are profoundly sorry. We hope our apology is accepted.

Garry and Robert. 

GOOD FATHERS MAKE BAD EMPLOYEES?

Britainthinks is now up and running.  It's a kind of online speakers corner.

Some of the posters really seem to be hitting a nerve. Career women make bad mothers, in particular. And thousands of people are hitting on the site. 

If you've got an opinion about anything, download it on camera and upload it on Britainthinks.

Ollie and Mo are out on the road looking for the most opinionated people in Britain.

Yesterday: London Today, Monday 4th: Nottingham Tuesday 5th: Sheffield Wednesday 6th: Leeds Thursday 7th: Manchester Friday 8th: Glasgow Saturday 9th: Edinburgh.

You can follow their progress on www.britainthinksontour.com

I was talking to a child psychologist the other day. They said that any parent who spends more than 55 hours a week at work including travelling time is probably a bad parent.

Doesn't matter what sex you are. 

SANDWICHED BETWEEN JOY AND HOPE....

Anyone who's been down Carnaby Street recently will have noticed the following.

 1) Beta towers is throbbing.

 2) The Carnaby Street Christmas decorations are spectacular. Some believe they have been paid for entirely out of Mr Lace's unspent new business budget.

3) Beta towers is sandwiched between the huge inflatable decorations that are 'Joy' and 'Hope.'

We have decided we won't be sending out Xmas cards this year. Not very green. Too 'old' economy. And Albion would probably take the piss out of them.

Instead we've decided to have 'a happening' to which everyone is welcome.  We're going to film it and put it online.

Our happening will be entitled 'SANDWICHED BETWEEN JOY AND HOPE.' It will take place sometime towards the end of next week at a time yet to be revealed. It will be worth turning up for.

All suggestions as to what we should sandwich between joy and hope will be gratefully accepted.  But please, folks, nothing that is likely to cause public offence. We'd hate to upset anyone...;-)

HELLO GREEN AND WOOD. GOOD BYE CAMPBELL AND LACE....

We're now six months old. And for all sorts of reasons Garry and Robert have decided to do something that Ogilvy, Mather, J Walter Thompson, Doyle, Dane and Bernbach, never did: take their names off the door. So now we are just (Beta). And all the beta for it.

Why?

Because losing Campbell Lace is the right thing to do. (Beta) is much bigger than Garry and Robert already. (Beta) is a philosophy...a way of being...continuous improvement...never satisfied...always new....testing...testing...testing...speaking of which, we're incredibly excited to announce...

1) Mark Wood has joined us as our chairman.

Those of you who know Mark and his awesome reputation in the world of business and finance will understand why we're so lucky to have him. In recent years Mark has been CEO of both Axa, and The Prudential. Latterly he set up pensions company Paternoster. He's also been a great friend, inspiration, and sanity check for (Beta) in its formative months.

It's thrilling for us to have Mark on board. His presence adds a dimension to (Beta) that ensures we will never be just another advertising agency. Yeee Haaa.

2) Malcolm Green joins (Beta) as a partner.

From Gary Lineker for Walkers to Howard at the Halifax, Malcolm has one of the most awesome showreels in the business. But Malcolm is not a man who rests on his laurels. Since he left DLKW he has worked with Naked Communications, directed commercials, and videos. He joins us January 1st. Happy new year indeed.

Welcome Malcolm. It is a pleasure and an honour.

We had a modest soiree last week to celebrate the news of Mark, and Malcolm, the heartless slaughter of Campbell and Lace, and to say thank you to some of our friends, colleagues and clients who have got us through the first six months.

Nat and Lol came and we were delighted to hand over their grand. The cheque was so big it needed two strapping lads to hold it up!

AND THE WINNERS ARE....

We're delighted to announce that Nat and Lol scooped the Beta Blog Bonanza with nearly half of your votes!

 So they get the grand. We think they might be on holiday, so as soon as they get back we'll present it to them.

So congratulations to Lol and Nat.

Thanks very much to the rest of you for your time, efforts and support.

There have been some wonderfully amusing, thought provoking, moving, and at times offensive moments.

We've had fun. We hope you have.

To Jack Gardener, who quite rightly campaigned for us to give the money to a children's charity - Jack we already are actively supporting two children's charities. The time, money and resource we give far exceeds the £1000.

And to Niail, who suggested that we were 'twallocks' for blogging and staying at the Mount Nelson  instead of attending to our clients - Robert is in fact staying at the Mount Nelson with a client. They've been shooting a commercial for some days now. The shoot is going well. So thanks for reminding us Niail what our priority should be, but trust us, we're on it. You twallock.

We're thrilled Nat and Lol won.

Let's celebrate.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YwEMxYggoKQ

VOTE NOW!!! VOTE NOW!!! VOTE NOW!!!

Entries for the amazing Beta blog £1000 giveaway are now closed. We want you to decide who wins the £1000. See below our shortlist of potential winners. At the bottom of the page is a natty polling device.

IN SUMMARY....

1) The amazing Campbell Lace Alpha blog by James Mitchell.

2) Two virals from the girls that invented virals. Nat and Lol.

3) Two virals from Danny Walsh. Apparently Danny has worked with Robert at two agencies but isn't Jim Kelly.

4) Two virals from a man called Matt Winn. Bonkers.

5) And last Claire Beale's immortal quote about Garry and dogs' bollocks.

SEE ACTUAL ENTRIES BELOW. PLEASE VOTE AT THE BOTTOM OF PAGE.

1) The Campbell Lace Alpha blog.  http://campbelllacealpha.blogspot.com/  

2) These two from Nat and Lol. (Scroll to bottom of page to vote.)

3) These two from Danny Walsh. (Scroll to bottom of page to vote.)

5) And last but not least how could we forget the immortal line from Claire Beale...

"ANYONE WHO KNOWS GARRY LACE KNOWS THAT ASKING HIM NOT TO CHASE NEW BUSINESS IS LIKE ASKING A DOG NOT TO LICK ITS BALLS."

Voting ends Wednesday night. Winners announced Thursday November 5th. 

WARNING. IMPOSTER BLOG!!!!

A late entry comes from James Mitchell, with his Campbell Lace Alpha blog

Very amusing. Definitely on the short list.

http://campbelllacealpha.blogspot.com/

NAT AND LOLLY BACK ON TOP!!!

Just when we'd drawn up our shortlist, Nat and Lolly smash it out of the park with 'Water Cooler.'

Its scary. Nat and Lolly's hold on the stuff we actually talk about is too accurate to be true. How did they know that Garry's pet name for Robert is 'cupcake?' We're having Carnaby Street swept for bugs.

So we're adding 'Water Cooler' to our shortlist. The people's vote will start on 1st of November and last for four days.

Here it is. Enjoy.

p.s. For those of you who think the idea of Robert as a transvestive is absurd as suggested in 'Watercooler'...Unfortunately we have no pictures of when Robert turned up at the WACL Valentines Day Dinner Blind Date competition dressed as a woman. (1998?) But that night he saw off both Brett Gosper and Andrew Robertson to win a 'blind date' with Rio from the then very hot tv series Gladiators. My goodness she was big and strong.  Has anyone out there still got pictures? Those were days. 

DANNY WALSH, COME ON DOWN.

First came the supremely witty Claire Beale with Garry licking his own balls. Then came Nat and Lolly's excellent viral.

 And now, Danny Walsh - whoever he is - with his razor sharp parody of Nat and Lolly's viral.

Danny. You are currently front runner for our £1000 prize. Congratulations, mate. p.s. Who are you?

BEDTIME ANTICS

As Robert slowly sank into his bed after an exhausting but highly enjoyable birthday, he only had one thing on his mind. In bed already was the love of his life and mother of his children. It was, after all, his birthday he thought to himself.

Time was of the essence since at 51,you're not quite as up to it as you used to be. Undaunted by this prospect, Robert decided to get straight to the point. "There's something I'd really like", he said starting to move closer to the beautiful woman he had met on that fateful night in New York all those years ago. Buoyed by the fact that he had not been given the immediate cold shoulder, he continued. "And, I've been thinking about it all day".

"I'd really like your hand in marriage"

Yes, we have our first agency engagement. Our resident rocker Robert is getting married to our artist in residence and all round beautiful woman, Gurmit. We are all thrilled and have spent the only profit we've made so far on new dresses in anticipation of the big event.

Secretly, we all think that Robert's done it to allow the last ten days of our blog competition to focus around everyone's views of this happy event. So, get replying, get commenting and get congratulating and you could still win that £1000. If you do, you'll be able to buy yourself a new frock. 

NAT AND LOLLY. NUMBER ONE WITH A BULLET....

So, another week of our fabulous £1000 blog giveaway has passed.

Many tried to knock Claire B off the top slot, they all failed.

Except for two: Nat and Lolly.

We love their viral taking the piss out of Garry and Rob's discussions about closing for new business. It's currently rocketing to the top of the 'most viewed' ratings on youtube.

But please do not confuse Nat and Lolly's handiwork with this  promotional video that is tagged 'Lace Campbell' on youtube.

Wow. Doesn't Robert look foxy in a wig?

Congratulations to Nat and Lolly. Commiserations to Claire B. And 'must try harder' to all the other entrants. Keep 'em coming, folks. Keep 'em coming.

You've got two weeks left to dazzle us.

SMARTARSES WANTED. £1000 REWARD.

Numbers of comments on our blog took a dramatic upturn last week. 

The witty, the poetic, the controversial, the wise, the bitchy all threw their hats into the ring to win our £1000 'comment of the month prize.'

Fartacus opened the batting with 'I like Lemons.' Possibly not the wittiest comment, Farty, but certainly the shortest.

Bob Ashwood proved to us that long copy is not dead. Just a little bit senile. Ironic, given that on Bob's  blog he declares 'Lifes too short. A sentence can't be.' We have a one word brief for you Bob. Haiku. 

Martin Thomas neither confirmed nor denied that he wears stockings and suspenders.

Mark Hurst invited us out to lunch. Be very, very afraid when you go out to lunch with Mark.

Jaqueline De Steele was front runner for a moment with her poignant poetry about her beautiful son. Until someone spotted Jaqueline was actually Robert's mum and it was all getting a little too Oedipal.

Antoine De Git shamed us. 

The Original Man in the Sky penned a very well argued critique of Albion.

Jonathan Durden agreed, eventually,  it was not wise for Beta to mindlessly pitch for new business. We love you Jonathan.

Richard Huntindon, sadly. declined to comment. 

But the comment of the week, by a country mile, and therefore the current £1000 front runner, wasn't even on our blog.

It was in Campaign. And it was written by none other than Claire Beale.

'ASKING GARRY LACE TO STOP CHASING NEW BUSINESS IS LIKE ASKING A DOG TO STOP LICKING ITS BALLS.'

Laugh? In the words of the late, great Peter Cook, 'we nearly shat.'

Claire. You are currently in line to win £1000.

So who's gonna knock Claire off the top slot?

WE'RE CLOSING.

We've had a fab five months. We've got a great bunch of people working here, and a client list that we're very proud of....

Thomas Cook. Jackpotjoy. The Outdoor Advertising Association. BUPA. Ealing Studios. A major charity who we have to keep secret. A web build for some celebs who wish to remain anonymous.

We're waiting on the result of two major pitches.

And we're getting nicely stuck into a couple of 'non conventional' ventures.  (We've always promised ourselves that we'll develop our own IP as well as working for clients. And although we're not really ready to talk about this side of our business yet, so far so good.)

We're having fun. We're doing good work (fingers crossed). Why screw it up by pitching mindlessly?

So we've decided to close our doors to new business for a while. Give our existing clients the attention they more than deserve. Do some housekeeping. Persuade Campaign to take a picture of us that doesn't make us look like dodgy rozzers, etc.

Oh, and we feel we've been neglecting our blog.  So to get things going again and to celebrate our good fortune so far we're going to give a prize of £1000 to the most interesting, amusing, useful, useless, outrageous comment posted on our blog during the month of October.

Garry and Robert's decision will be final. Competition ends 31st of October 2009.

Bon chance!

WE LOVE COKE

Six years ago Robert got involved with a genius film maker called Jeremy Gilley.

Jeremy's vision was to create a Global Day of Peace. 

If you havent seen his documentaries you should.  The story of how Jeremy persuaded the United Nations to create a fixed day of peace is noting short of amazing. http://www.peaceoneday.org/en/welcome

Peace Day is September 21st.

Robert's idea was to spread the word by getting Coke to 'sponsor' September 21st on their cans.

Well, six years later coke have done it!  Good on 'em.

So on Monday 21st of September make peace with someone you've wronged. Buy them a Coke and say sorry.

p.s. If anyone out there is any doubt as to Coke's 'right' to sponsor Peace Day, remember this commercial. Run against the backdrop of the Vietnam War it shows remarkable courage on the part of an often demonised corporation who want to make a difference.